i was away from reality for 26 hours... up there in the mountains, i've tried to discover myself more so i could face reality anew... i did look back during my time of introspection and yet i had to look ahead of the future so i can build my dreams... but this moment we called NOW, is something i could not just neglect... i've realized that i was so pre-occupied with my past and worry too much what lies ahead... how can i enjoy this time called the PRESENT? i value other people too much that i'm so afraid of failing them. i'm so happy when we're together and yet there are days that they're living their own lives and i feel so alone... so alone that i keep myself busy so i can momentarily forget that i can never be happy without them. should i think of myself more this time? i'm probably other people's source of joy but have i really come in to terms with myself? being away from reality for 26 hours just reflecting on how i've been facing it for the last 26 years of existence led me to more questions about life... yes, i'm still trying to discover myself as i continue to face reality... i just can't run away.
Oct 25, 2004
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