just scribbling them all down

today is one of those rare saturdays that i just need to sit down and rest. i'm supposed to be doing two major tasks : sagip in the morning and laundry (either before or after my sagip service). well, i wasn't able to do any of those. i spent my whole day watching tv and browsing the net. i know my brother is getting tired of my idleness lately (you should see him giving me litany all the time----i'm damn getting tired of those!). being idle is not even my nature,i just don't wanna tire myself too much lately. a day in the office is already too much for me to handle, when i get home,l i just wanna do one thing---REST. i have a rather logical explanation to that. you know, i used to contribute a lot at home in all aspects but for the past months now, i just couldn't do too much physical work. i feel that i haven't been breathing normally, i get tired easily and experience chest pains once in a while. yes, i've been seeing a doctor since december (right after i got hospitalized). i had one vaccination recently and will have another one this month. these vaccinations if not only would give me some sort of assurance of a better health is not something i will normally take. i find each shot quite costly, soooo way beyond my tight budget. my medicine for maintenance is also costly, i badly need to buy one already since the 60th inhalation has long been over but i couldn't afford it. my budget is quite tight, it's either i take the vaccination or buy that damn expensive medicine! another thing to consider is the upcoming SFC International Leaders' Conference next week at Baguio...i don't know how will i be able to manage the expenses there. i never had these soooo much pressure financially before, somehow i managed to play with what i have.maybe all these will also pass ---i don't really know how, honestly. every time, i wake up in the morning lately... i never fail to thank God for letting me still see another morning despite all the breathing problems :) somehow, i know i'll be able to manage all these---again, i really don't know how...maybe, God just loves me so much that He helps me bear all these:)

i need to just jot down some firstssssss for the year :
a) trip to indonesia

b) anti-bacteria vaccination
c) another major adjustment (new manager came in last month)