About my Blog

Stories of a thirty something girl. She travels.She reads.She writes.She dreams.She prays.She lives.

Sep 28, 2006

obladi, oblada life goes on

as september nearly ends in a few days, i'd like to share some serious thoughts. it's my birthmonth and i always feel sentimental whenever another year adds to my age. oh, i don't really mind getting older, i look young anyway (hahaha!)...this year i've celebrated my birthday in probably the most simple way ever. my birthday week was spent alone in our new apartment. i was so sick for a week due to fever & colds, maybe God just wanted me to rest because i was too busy with work & sfc community lately. the night before my birthday since i was feeling better, i still attended our weekly household meeting. we had it at sister jo-anne's place in greenland. our topic was about simple guidelines, we had to choose one out of the 10 listed and reflect on it. when it was my turn to share, i said, since it's gonna be my birthday the next day, instead of making 3 wishes, just let me choose 3 guidelines to share my insights on. these were the 3 guidelines i chose:

a) BE PATIENT...I managed to fix it so in just one lifetime you could have so many diverse experiences.you grow from a child to an adult, have children, change jobs many times, learn many trades, travel so many places, meet thousands of people and experience so much. how can you be so impatient then when it takes Me a little longer than you expect to handle something on My to-do-list? trust in My timing, for My timing is perfect. Just because I created the entire universe in only six days, everyone thinks I should always rush,rush,rush.

b) LOVE YOURSELF...As much as I love you, how can you not love yourself? You were created by me for one reason only - - - to be loved, and to love in return.I am a God of Love. Love Me. love your neighbors but also love yourself. it makes my heart ache when i see you angry with yourself when things go wrong. you are very precious to me. don't ever forget.

c) TALK TO ME...I want you to forget a lot of things. forget what was making you crazy. forget the worry and the fretting because you know I'm in control. but there's one thing I pray you never forget. please, don't forget to talk to Me- OFTEN! I love YOU! i want to hear your voice. i want you to include Me in on the things going on in your life. i want to hear you talk about your friends and family. prayer is simply you having a conversation with Me. i want to be your dearest friend.

right after the sharing, they gave me a birthday cake (the one that i was really wishing to have, Red Ribbon's latest addition to their cakes!), as i blew the candles,of course i wished for B....BETTER HEALTH (hehe, akala nyo boyfriend noh?). when my real birthday came the next day, my siblings and i just had a simple lunch at home right after my SAGIP session in the morning.well, this year as i said was the simplest but i was very happy that i was able to spend the day serving the community and hangin' around with family.

btw, jm and i moved to a new apartment...i love it better here, it's more spacious and got a separate laundry area. during the time when we were preparing to move, i was able to flip through pages of an old notebook...i totally forgot about it until when i was packing my old stuff and saw it. i stopped writing journal entries in college and threw my old high school diary ages ago...i didn't know that i was still keepin' compilation of hate letters in this old notebook.they were my hate letters to life ..yes, i was hating life then and writing about how i felt about my life was the meanest thing i could do then...i once again read about my aches, my hurts, my rants,grudges and everything that seems to be so uncontrollable back then. i even saw a letter to papa telling him how i hate living life without him.it was late 2000 until 2002 and learning that i stopped writing hate letters in 2003, i reflected...2003 was the year i started to get deeply involved in my service in Gawad Kalinga and started having a more personal relationship with God. since i found new hope from the people surrounding me, i started to see life anew...no space for hate...and definitely, no time to write hate letters! i didn't throw the notebook...it will be my constant reminder of how i've journeyed this colorful life...i dare to stay and continue to travel.with a different attitude towards life this time, when the road seems dark and rough, i now know where to look...NOT BACK BUT UP!